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This bride just wants to make sure everyone is on the same page.
That’s why she decided to actually write out the costs and time commitments that she expected of her bridesmaids.
TikTok user Lisa, with the username @lisalovesrandom, posted a video earlier this week explaining the “transparency letter†she wrote to her bridesmaids, Fox News reports.
Lisa appears to have made the clip in response to another TikTok video, where the person wrote: “When you agree to be a bridesmaid without realising it’ll cost three whole paychecks and every second of your PTO for the year.â€
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After showing that initial clip, the video cuts to Lisa, who said she was going to offer “a tip that I used to be more transparent with my bridal partyâ€.
First, Lisa explained that before she got engaged, she had been a bridesmaid, but wasn’t aware of how much it was going to cost, or what exactly the bride expected of her as a bridesmaid.
That’s why she decided to change things up for her own bridesmaids, even though she felt awkward about it at first.
“I felt very insecure doing this, but I’m ultimately glad that I did and that was, include a letter of what I expected from my bridal party,†Lisa said in the clip.
She explained that she put the letter in a “cute little envelope†and included the letter in the gift box she gave to her prospective bridesmaids.
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“And in that letter, I outlined time commitments,†Lisa said. “So I told them if they live over an hour away, they didn’t have to worry about making it to the bridal shower, or to go wedding dress shopping with me, it was fine.
“I also specified money commitments,†she said. “So I told them I would pay for their hair and makeup, but that they would be responsible for the cost of the bridesmaid dress, although they had freedom as to what style they wanted. I just wanted a specific colour.â€
However, Lisa also said she wanted her friends to know they didn’t have to be her bridesmaids.
“Most importantly, I told them that they could say no to being a bridesmaid, that we would still be friends and that they could keep all gifts within the bridesmaid proposal box,†Lisa said.
In fact, she added: “One of them said no and we’re still good friends.â€
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In a follow-up clip, Lisa actually shared the transparency letter and addressed some people’s concerns about her asking her bridesmaids to pay for anything.
“I want to emphasise that the reason behind my last video was more to introduce the concept of normalising brides being transparent about what they expect from a bridal party and also to allow bridesmaids to say no if they don’t want to be part of that commitment,†Lisa said in her second TikTok video.
She then showed the letter to viewers and said later: “If your thoughts are, ‘I would never ask that of somebody,’ or ‘I would never do that for someone else,’ then don’t.â€
Lisa then went on to say that all brides have different preferences and bridesmaids have different expectations, so it’s good to be clear from the start.
“People are just different,†Lisa said. “Brides want different things. Bridesmaids expect different things. This is why I think a transparency letter is a good idea. That way, everybody’s on the same page.â€
This article originally appeared on Fox News and was reproduced with permission
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