‘Never-ending’: Lisa Curry’s sad admission

The 33-year-old — the eldest of Ms Curry’s three children with former Ironman Grant Kenny — died in September last year after a battle with an undisclosed long-term illness.

At the time, Ms Curry wrote in a devastating tribute that Jaimi’s death was “so painful” she could “barely breathe”.

“Our hearts are broken and the pain is unbearable but we cherish every wonderful moment we got to share with our treasured and so loved first child,” she said.

“Rest in peace my beautiful baby. I will miss you every sunrise, I will miss you when the sun is shining and the birds are singing … I will miss you when I close my eyes. I will miss you when I open my eyes. I will miss our long hugs and long chats.”

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In her Body+Soul column today, the 58-year-old opened up about the “long, hard road for our family” since Jaimi’s death.

“Actually, it’s been a really sh*tty year,” Ms Curry wrote.

“Analysing the constant thoughts of losing our most precious firstborn, Jaimi, has been sad and exhausting. It’s overwhelming. It’s never-ending.

“I’m tired of being tired. I’m tired of being sad and exhausted. I’m sad that the fun in my soul has disappeared. But I’m sure that’s not how our loved ones who have passed would want us to feel.

“Unfortunately, I belong to a group that no-one ever wants to be in and, sadly, it’s a group to which many belong. When you lose a child, you lose part of yourself. And for many of us, life just keeps throwing more and more at us.”

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Menopause, Ms Curry added, has exacerbated “the most intense loss and heartache”.

“My muscles ache so much, and the pain feels like I’ve been hit by a truck,” she admitted.

“I’ve read articles on how stress and trauma is stored in the muscles … or is it just menopause? Even my fingers and toes are sore … Some days it’s just plain hard to get out of bed.”

But, despite “all these negatives, I still have a life to live”, she wrote.

Ms Curry credits her “beautiful family, beautiful family, great friends, the most loving, caring and supportive husband, a great ex-husband, and the most adorable little grandsons” for ensuring she continues “living well — and not just existing”.

Residing on Queensland’s Sunshine Coast, Ms Curry is the co-founder of Happy Health You, an Australia-based women’s health and lifestyle company.

“We live in a great spot that’s relaxing and quiet. I run a business I love and have a beautiful staff that I’m proud to call my friends. I am grateful for my life,” she wrote.

“It’s just that it has changed, and I now know it’s at times like these we learn to live again — just differently.

“Some days I feel like I’ll never get back to the old me. But it’s incredible how just a few small, sustainable and achievable changes can make a huge difference to your future – if you are consistent!”

Body+Soul magazine is available in The Sunday Telegraph (NSW), Sunday Herald Sun (Victoria), The Sunday Mail (Queensland), Sunday Mail (SA) and Sunday Tasmanian (Tasmania).