Tracey Cox reveals the weird sex techniques that actually work!

Getting a bit bored with the same old routine but feel like you’ve tried it all?

Bet you haven’t tried all of these quirky sex techniques!

They might sound ridiculously far-fetched but they get rave user reviews – and all are put to the test by my brave volunteers.

Grab your sense of adventure – and a few props – and give them a go.

GRAPEFRUIT ORAL SEX

Eight years ago, a woman called Auntie Angel posted a YouTube video showing how to ‘please your man’ by giving him oral sex with a grapefruit around the base of his penis.

She demonstrates on a dildo – making such unexpected noises, I guarantee they will scar you forever.

Since then, grapefruit oral sex has become a ‘thing’.

Why would I try it?

If you watch the original video, I’m not entirely sure you’ll be able to manage doing this without laughing. But give it a whirl anyway!

To say it’s a novel experience is stating the obvious but it’s fun – and we all get way too serious about sex.

The grapefruit technique is also perfect for women who don’t enjoy giving oral sex because they gag easily. Wearing the grapefruit takes three inches off the length, so there’s no potential for ‘deep-throating’.

It’ll be a first for most of you – and something to amuse your friends with when you retell the story after a couple of wines.   

How do I do it?

Use a Ruby Red grapefruit (or the sweetest variety you can find) and put it in warm water to get it to room temperature. (If you’re allergic to grapefruit, you can use a large naval orange.)

You then roll it on a benchtop for a minute or two to loosen the fruit and make the flesh juicier. Cut the two navel ends off, so it resembles a thick wheel, and cut a small hole in the centre of the grapefruit. (The smaller the hole, the tighter it will feel when you first push it down over the penis.)

Because citrus fruits are acidic, always check first to make sure his penis doesn’t have any little cuts or razor burn to avoid it stinging. Then, wait until he’s erect then slowly push the grapefruit down to the base of the penis: the fruit expands as you press it down.

As you can imagine, juice goes everywhere, so put a couple of towels down, get him to stand in the bath (yes really) or on a floor you can easily clean afterwards. The juice, by the way, is all part of the experience – and the bit lots of men said was the best.

You then perform oral sex, as you usually would, while rotating the grapefruit around the shaft and pushing it up and down. Continue sucking and twisting the grapefruit until orgasm.

I’d strongly advise washing his penis and testicles quickly afterwards, simply because the juice is acidic, although urologists say there aren’t any health risks.

The verdict: 6.5/10

‘Don’t get me wrong: it felt great and everyone should try it at least once. But it’s just comical and my partner kept laughing, which set me off. She also broke out in a rash on her chin afterwards: the juice irritated her skin. 

It does feel weirdly good though – the grapefruit felt much colder than I expected and a warm tongue and something cold was a good combo.’

THE KIVIN METHOD  

In a nutshell, this is simply sideways oral sex. Which isn’t that out there until you consider that nearly all of us do it with our lover positioned straight between our legs.

The Kivin method has the person who is giving, put their body perpendicular – rather than parallel – to the person who is on the receiving end. Confused? Here’s a diagram: https://imgur.com/a/Jh8uQ1S

It’s a complete mystery where the name came from, by the way, but it’s been used to describe sideways oral since 2001.

Why would I try it?

Because it allows your partner to explore the whole of the vulva, not just target the clitoris. Lots of women find straight up-and-down stimulation too intense or find that they like one side of their clitoris licked more than the other.

The sideways stimulation feels surprisingly unusual and more intense for some women – which is perhaps why some sex educators claim it makes women reach orgasm faster (anecdotal evidence says between three to five minutes).

It also allows easy access to the perineum – the hairless bit between the vagina and anus. This area is packed with highly sensitive nerve endings and responds well to firm massage (using fingers or a sex toy).

How do I do it?

If you’re the lucky recipient, lie on the bed (in the position you would sleep in, head near the top of the bed) with one leg lifted.

Your partner lies sideways across the bed, stomach on the bed, and slips under your lifted leg, positioning their mouth between your legs. You then drape your leg over your partner’s neck or upper back.

Some givers find it more comfortable to be propped up on their knees and leaning forward. An alternative position for the receiver: you pull both your legs up, so your knees are against your chest.

They can then easily stimulate the clitoris and vulva, choosing whatever angle, speed and pressure you enjoy. Get them to try licking side by side and back and forth over the clitoris while simultaneously using two fingers to press firmly on the perineum, massaging firmly.

Or to combine tongue clitoral stimulation with a finger inserted into the vagina or anus. Another great combination: using a penetrative sex toy vaginally and/or inserting a butt plug for added anal stimulation.

Add a firm pillow under your bottom if want to take pressure off your partner’s back, which is bearing the weight of your leg.

The verdict: 9/10

‘I am a huge oral sex fan but have never even thought to try having it sideways. I loved the novelty and it definitely felt more intense for me. I think I like it better than ‘normal’ oral sex!’

THE CAT TECHNIQUE  

The Coital Alignment Technique is a modified version of missionary style sex, where the man rides higher up the body than usual, allowing the base of his penis to rub against the clitoris.

One famous study of women unable to orgasm from missionary style sex, reported a 56 per cent increase in orgasm frequency, once they and their partners mastered it.

CAT adds the all-important missing ingredient which prevents the majority of women from orgasming from penetration alone – clitoral stimulation.

It’s probably easier to hold a vibrator in place – the technique takes practise to get it right. But this method can be more intimate and I personally know many couples who consider CAT a game-changer and who now rarely have intercourse ‘old-school’.

Why would I try it?

Believe the convincing statistics and a switch to CAT will instantly double her chances of climaxing – and slow him down by about the same rate. A winning combination, wouldn’t you say?

The reason why we didn’t ditch the ‘pump’ style of thrusting when CAT came out ages ago is that he’s rather fond of it – and this technique takes practise.

Think direct pressure, rocking and grinding and you’re on the right track.

How do I do it?

He’s on top but riding high, his body moved up toward her head and staying close rather than holding himself up on his arms. Keep your pelvises close, so the base of his penis rubs against her clitoris and stays there as you move together. Picture an even paced rocking chair movement: she leads in the upward stroke, pushing up and forward to force his pelvis backward. He forces her pelvis backward and downward. It’s pressure and counterpressure, not thrusting, with penetration shallow not deep.

The verdict: 5/10 from a beginner

‘I found it so unnatural. Thrusting feels natural because it is: it’s how animals have sex. I found it really hard to find any rhythm at all because it’s the opposite to what I’ve been doing the whole of my life. It felt forced and contrived and really unsatisfying. My partner didn’t rave about it but that probably had a lot to do with me clearly not getting into it.’

10/10 from an expert: ‘It’s not as hard as it sounds but it is so tempting at the start to switch back into the thrusting you’re used to when you feel yourself wanting to climax. Which then ruins it for her, unless she’s come first. You need to be a controlled, patient person to perfect this. But, if you can, your partner will really thank you. We have never looked back.’

There’s a new episode of Tracey’s new weekly podcast, SexTok, every Tuesday. Subscribe wherever you listen to your podcasts.